Judge in need of "The Letter"

I called the court clerk last Tuesday to inquire if the judge had made his decision(s) yet in regards to my gender change or the fee waiver. She informed me that nothing in my case file indicated he had made decisions yet, and she promised to hunt him down when court wasn't in session and get back to me.

And she did. He wants a letter from my therapist confirming that I am, in fact, trans.

I thumbed through my papers looking around desperately for "The Letter" - what's required from a therapist in order to have a doctor prescribe hormones. The last I saw it I was either bringing the original or a copy to my doctor in December of 2009.

In the end, I couldn't find that letter for the life of me. I had to ask the therapist who originally wrote it for me for another letter - whether it's a new one or the original - to bring to the judge. I haven't heard back from him yet, so tomorrow I'm going to figure out what the fax number for my judge is, call my hormone doctor and hope that she still has a copy of my letter that she could fax.

Once that's done, presumably, he will grant my gender change.

I haven't heard a thing about the fee waiver yet. Hopefully it goes through, because I'm broke. Fingers crossed.

Now, what has been granted so far is a legal name change which I'm very excited about. I've been asked more than once, "So why Dexter?", or "Why Mel as a middle name?", "What did your folks think about your chosen name?", and, "Did you involve them in this decision?"

I chose the name 'Dexter' because I've wanted it for as long as I can remember. When I was younger, I would rotate between Lance, Rex, or Dewey. Eventually I developed a preference for either Dewey or Dexter, which has remained since. I initially leaned toward "Mel Dewey Thomas", but then immediately predicted a world of relentless mildew jokes. So then I thought about Dewey Mel Thomas, but... Dexter has the best ring to it. It can be shortened to Dex. The more I thought about it, the more I liked it.

I made Mel my middle name because I want both names to be used. Since so many people already know me as Mel and it's been my name throughout my life, I've kept it. And I'm making it my middle name so that a.) people won't ask me constantly what 'Mel' is short for and b.) 'Dexter' won't be doomed to middle name oblivion.

My parents are entirely supportive. My dad suggested that since he and my mom named me the first time around, they should be able to name me the second time around.

He asked, "How about Hossenfeffer?", and my mom chimed in, "Hos is so manly!". Then I asked, "Isn't that a dead rabbit dish from Germany?" -- "Sure! But it's also a good first name!"

Or not. I mean, as fitting as it is and all... I ultimately decided to name myself. No Hossenfeffer Thomas here!


  1. your 'rents are cool.
    it's a man's world. welcome (officially) lol.

  2. My 'rents are. Hossenfeffer isn't! Thanks for the official welcome. ;]

  3. Are you going to want to be addressed as Dexter, or Mel?

    If you're sticking with Mel, I would like to warn you ahead of time that going by your middle name sucks. Take it from me.

  4. Dexter sounds like a neat name.

  5. LOL Your dad is so funny. I think you made the right move by not letting your dad pick your name, in this instance... Also glad I can at least keep calling you Mel. Though if you really WANTED me to, I'd learn to call you Dex... glad I don't have to :)

  6. darkoshi: Thank you! I've loved it for years and now it's all mine at long last!

  7. I'm glad you chose Dexter. Lance smacks of gay porn star to me. But you'll always be Mel to me. Unless I can perfect my Deb Morgan impersonation of saying "Dex" -Brenda

  8. Brenda: What doesn't smack like gay porn star to you?

    And you can totally perfect your Deb Morgan impression! Practice on me!


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